Thank you Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for the prompt for this week. I think I’ve become a FriFic addict. It’s far better to be addicted to writing than other things, I guess. The genre is romance. Of course. A heartbreaker. Of course. BTW it’s the ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY of my blog. Woot, woot!!!
Fireworks: photo courtesy of Lora Mitchell
She held his hand and hoped she would feel something. A squeeze. Caress of the palm with a fingertip. Anything. The fireworks in the sky lit up their faces and the balmy summer night. She turned to face him. No words were exchanged. Not once did he look her way. She released his hand and turned back to the spectacle before them. She knew it was over. There was nothing left. He was done with her. With her shoes held in her left hand, she walked down the beach. Away from him. From their life. Knowing their story was over.
**My darlin’, I miss you. My darlin’, who knew. Who knew….**
heartbreak in 100 words. 😥 I’m loving your evolution Renee. 🙂
Hey there Stu. I’m glad you liked it. The only problem I’m having with writing this genre is that I cry when I proofread my work. I’m kind of hoping that if I cry my readers will feel emotional too. Much love to you Stu. Keep reading me. OXOXOXXOXOOX
Always, Renee
That’s the proof in the work – if YOU don’t cry how can you expect your readers to? Keep it up – you’re good at it. 🙂 x
Thanks babe. I’ll be sure to. ❤
LOLLL!! You cry?
Very nice, sad story.
And happy anniversary!
haunting! congrats on the one year! 🙂
Thank you for your kind comment. Haunting was kind of what I was going for. And thanks for the congrats. I can’t believe it’s been a year already… 🙂
Dear Renee,
This almost reads like a poem. Tears from the author translate to tears from the reader. You have grown as a writer since you first came to us. Nice to see. Happy anniversary on your blog.
shalom,
Rochelle
Rochelle,
Thank you so much for your kind words. I’m not sure where this story came from, but it took about 10 minutes to write. I was only one word over when it was in rough draft. Your photo prompts move me. And they make me more proud of my work. I thank you for your criticisms too. For how will I grow, if I don’t learn to take the bad with the good? I appreciate every word.
Fondly, Renee
You cry because it hits the heart – right where you want the words to strike. It echoes against the chambers that feel the emptiness of loss. Beautifully done Renee – and Happy Anniversary!!
Thanks Mimi. For every word. Thank you. You’re a sweetheart.
I wrote something to you yesterday, write something today please
I teared up while reading this – how heartbreaking that not even the beauty of the moment could stir feelings between them.
I believe she still felt for him, but he no longer did. It’s sad when love dies.
Thanks for your kind comment my dear. I’m glad you felt it. I did too, when I was writing it.
So very sad. New Year can also be a time for endings… nicely conveyed.
Thanks dear. Very sad. I’m finding it’s something I’m good at writing about. Heartbreak.
Congrats! On the 1 year
Thanks so much.
Chills! Happy Anniversary! You are a great inspiration! Congratulations!
Oh honey I’m glad you felt it. I sure did when I wrote it. I kinda think you’re an inspiration too. I really do. Thanks.
🙂
I’m not even going to comment on that. But thank you, sweet loving woman! Hugs!!!
🙂
Oh thank you honey. Hugs right back at you. 😉
Congratulations on your one year. Mine is coming up soon, although I’ll have to check to see what date. I’m sure WordPress will remind me. 🙂 I hope your narrator has better luck next time. At least she had a beautiful good-bye.
Thank you! WP most certainly does remind you. You get a little award and everything. 🙂 The only thing beautiful things about the goodbye was the beach and the fireworks. How sad to associate such things with the end of a love story. Ah well, it happens that way sometimes….
At least the beauty may lift your heart out of the sadness a bit.
That’s very true. It was a beautiful spectacle.
Happy anniversary Renee!!! I could feel the heartbreak reading this. Very well captured…
Thank you and thank you my dear Boomiebol. Hugs and kisses.
Happy blogiversary may this be the first of many xxx
Thanks so much my dear Paula. I hope it is the first of many also. 🙂
the dream of a finger’s touch given in a certain way. that image is so powerful and well placed on the page. you evoke emotion well.
ps: love the tattoo photo and what it says!
Thank you for the kind comment. I appreciate it. I loved the story as it fell out of my head. It made me cry as I proofread it.
I wish the tat was mine. Someday it may just be. I’m glad you’re here.
XOXOXOX, Renee
Happy Anniversary on your blog! Congrats. I enjoyed this piece. Somehow the background of the fireworks in the sky puts a new emphasis on the personal fireworks, and a time to ask, “Is there anything here or left worth holding to?” Well done!
Thank you so much. I can’t believe it’s been a year already. I’ve learned so much. I will continue to do so. I’m glad you saw the story as I did. It was a heartbreaker to write. Can you believe it took 10 minutes?? I’m so glad you read it.
Great build of character in so few words! I was inside her head, and that hurt!
Thank you so much for your comment. That’s exactly what I was going for. For you to feel her pain. Her sadness. I appreciate you reading my story.
Happy Blogoversary! Woot! Yippie! Love the story too! A lot of great emotion and imagery in few words. Excellent!
Thank you my dear on both counts. I’m glad you liked my story. I bawled when I proofread it. I’m so happy you felt it too. I hope you’re doing well hon.
XOXOXOXOXO, Renee
I love it and hate it when that happens. The great thing is that we, your readers, felt those intense emotions. Now I love it when I “feel” through others words. Thanks for making me feel!
I am listening to the video you put up “Carry On” right now. Oh, I like it. Stars! 🙂
I am breathing slowly and trying to keep this wildly racing mind calm. 🙂 Many hugs and and smiles to you!
I first thought he might be comatose, but this was worse, he could care, he just didn’t
Nice
He was done with her. I think comatose would have been better. I think you may have sparked another story in this sparkly girl. Hmmmmmm.
Love, Renee
sparkle away!
🙂
Congrats on your First B-Day… I know it’s corny, but deserved. One year lead to two, it’s been fun hasn’t it, and you’ve learned a lot?
You really conveyed her empty sadness in convincing herself what she knew to be true… and when it should have been a happy time with the fireworks and all. I felt a bit sad for him too. Nice.
Thank you so much. I always thought I was a woman that talked too much. Little did I realize it would translate into a passion for writing. I never in a million years thought that I would write stories of heartbreak and so many others. I never knew. Now I can’t get the stories to stop. Which is good. Most of the time. Sometimes it makes me downright exhausted. See! I told you I talk a lot!
I’m glad you felt the story. It’s what I was going for. It’s sad when love dies. For the one it dies within first and then the one that has to go without that love and move on. I feel sad for him too. He’ll be lost without her. She, without him.
Love, Renee
broke my heart… great story though 🙂
That’s what I was going for my dear. I’m glad you felt it.
Love, Renee
Beautiful, brutal and true.
Happy Onesies, m’dear!
Knew you’d like it t. Thank you for the love. You’re so sweet.
Happy Anniversary. i am susceptible to crying these days so if you continue to write like this I will have to avoid you like I do beer and country music.
Honey I promise I don’t always write sad. I do write happy and dirty stuff too. If you want to laugh, read a journal entry. You’ll shake your head and wonder how the hell the people in my life put up with me. Giggle.
Love, Renee
Okay I will check it out.
Great story telling…
Thanks my dear.
Happy Bloggiversary, Renee. It seems as though we began our blogging adventures right around the same time. It’s been an incredible year; I would imagine you feel as grateful as I do, to have met some fantastically creative, kind, and brilliant people. Let us hope this next year brings us much of the same!
Blessings,
Cara
Hi there my sweet Cara. Thanks for such a kind comment. I’m glad you’re enjoying your adventure. I know I am. It’s been a learning experience that’s for sure. I’ve met some writers that have done nothing but astound me. I’ve learned so much. I feel so welcome here. I know that I have a lot to learn. I never realized that I could write. Now I’m writing a book. WOW! What are you doing now that you never thought you would? I will be sure to read you hon. We’ll learn from each other. Keep the dream going. We can only get better. 🙂
Take care and keep writing!
Love, Renee
Dear Renee,
And there’s absolutely no way to hide that body language, is there? Great story and well told.
Congratulations on year number one. Fireworks came at just the right moment, eh?
Aloha,
Doug
Good morning Doug,
I do believe you are right about the fireworks. I’m glad you liked the story. It still surprises me when a story comes to me so quickly. It took me 10 minutes to write it. It broke my heart and made me cry. You are so right about body language. It speaks volumes doesn’t it? I welcome your comments and criticisms. Thank you.
Love, Renee