Tunesday-Across the Universe

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Words are flowing out like
Endless rain into a paper cup
They slither wildly as they slip away across the universe.
Pools of sorrow waves of joy
Are drifting through my opened mind
Possessing and caressing me.

Lucy walked into Starbucks last night and stood before me. For a few moments we didn’t say anything. I hadn’t seen my young twin in almost a year, and here she was. Dark haired, with eyes painted like a classic pinup girl and hair cut and colored like Betti Page. I held her close and took in the familiarity of her form. Statuesque and bony from her straight edge life-style and vegan eating habits. I hugged her for as long as she’d let me. We ordered coffee and the blab fest began.

Jai Guru Deva. Om
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world

Lucy can be a scared rabbit and it’s hard for her to let people in. Me, she let into her life and shared everything with wild abandon. I was her spiritual sister. Her older twin. She’d often ask if we could build a time machine and rig it somehow so that we could forward and backward in time and become the same age. I told her not to worry, I’d plan on living with her when I was old and we’d do all the crazy things we’d ever discussed. With fear in her eyes, she’d say that the world would never be able to handle it.

Images of broken light, which
Dance before me like a million eyes,
They call me on and on across the universe.
Thoughts meander like a
Restless wind inside a letter box
They tumble blindly as they make their way across the universe.

I spoke to her of changes in my life. That I was separating from Roger Darling. She shared that she was moving to another state for a great job opportunity. Her long-term relationship was in transition too. We caught up on all of our secrets, fears and even told each other dirty jokes. Hey, we are strong willed and smart women with filthy, dirty minds. At one point I laughed so loudly, I swear they could hear me in the next county.

Jai Guru Deva. Om
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world

Lucy spoke of anxieties about moving away and all the steps she had to take to get settled. She was freaking out, but I assured her everything would be all right. All of the little pieces would fall into place. That the universe would align and all would be well. As our conversation commenced, Across the Universe by The Beatles drifted through the air. It was cosmic I tell ya. Fucking cosmic. Like it was meant to happen.

Sounds of laughter, shades of life
Are ringing through my opened ears
Inciting and inviting me.
Limitless undying love, which
Shines around me like a million suns,
It calls me on and on across the universe

Four hours later, our conversation was still going strong, but my long day was catching up to me. It was time for me to head home. We wandered out into the parking lot. As we hugged each other tightly, we promised to meet again before she left for good. I looked at her, and our history flashed through my busy mind. Even in the bitter yellow of the shitty street light, she looked fabulous.

Lucy and The Sparkly Girl, our universes have realigned, and the puzzle pieces are finally in place.

Jai Guru Deva.
Jai Guru Deva.
Jai Guru Deva.
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world
Nothing’s gonna change my world

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Tunesday-If I loved You by Delta Rae

Letting go

If I loved you, life would be easy
There’d be no truth that I’d be scared of
I could walk through every valley
And you’d light me with all of your love

But I don’t love you, not like I want to
I don’t love you and that makes it hard
And every morning, I see how you watch me
And each night I know you feel it and it just breaks your heart

You’d make good money and come home early
And you’d kiss me and hold me each night
We would have children and they would be so beautiful
And we’d raise them and all would be right

But I don’t love you, not like you need it
I don’t love you, good as you are
And when I kiss you, I know that you can feel it
And I see it in your eyes, and it just breaks my heart

I wish to God I could change it, darling
Could make you the one
I will always have these regrets and wonder
What else I could have done
I will

’Cause if I loved you, I could be happy
I would make you the light of my world
I wouldn’t wait, love, I’d marry you tomorrow
And we’d make love and I’d be your girl

But I don’t love you, much as I want to
I don’t love you, no, it would be a lie
And you deserve love, you’re better than a good day
And you’ll find it, but just not in my eyes

’Cause it ain’t here love, no
And it just breaks my heart

Tunesday-Windows Are Rolled Down

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Look up child 
The world is born 
Shoe’s untied 
And your soles are worn 

Windows are rolled down 
Sun is setting high 
Windows are rolled down 
I’m fixin’ to die 

Corn rows have companion feel 
This rocky road and this steering wheel 
Who do you call to ease your pain 
I hope for you to get through this rain 

Windows are rolled down 
Moon is hanging low 
Windows are rolled down 
Think it’s time for me to go hey-ay-ay-a…-ay 

Is it what you dreamed it’d be 
Are you locked up in this fantasy 
Oh this miles that have 
torn us apart 
My new found faith 
and my broken heart 

Windows are rolled down 
Sun is rising high 
Windows are rolled down 
Feel that wind rushing by hey-ay-ay-a… 

Windows are rolled down

Tunesday-10,000 Maniacs

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I wish I had appreciated my youth – I should have worn tighter clothing when I could have!
~Natalie Merchant ~

Take me now, baby, here as I am
Hold me close, n’ try n’ understand
Desire is hunger is the fire I breathe
Love is a banquet on which we feed

I heard this passionate ballad as I made my way into work this morning. It reminded me that I had a hot little story in my drafts folder. Finally, the romantic muses are roaming around in this blonde brain of mine. Hopefully I’ll have it finished and posted by tomorrow afternoon. Yes, it will be erotic. No, it won’t be filthy. Want to read filth, go somewhere else. Giggle, snort!

Because the night belongs to lovers
Because the night belongs to us
Because the night belongs to lovers
Because the night belongs to us

Love you and happy Tunesday!

Tunesday-Dear Daily Mail by Amanda “Fucking” Palmer

Amanda Fucking Palmer

I haven’t written a fucking word in over a week. I couldn’t even think of a good song to post for Tunesday. Then what appeared in my email inbox, but a lovely kiss off to the Daily Mail by one of my idols, Amanda Fucking Palmer.

I’ve posted a couple more of more of her videos, because, well, she’s fucking AWESOME!

Warning: Amanda is not for the faint of heart. Think that’s why I like her.

I’m hoping my words come back soon, because I promised a certain redhead that I’d write our story. Wink, wink.

Do It With a Rock Star

In my mind
In a future five years from now
I’m one hundred and twenty pounds
And I never get hung over
Because I will be the picture of discipline
Never minding what state I’m in
And I will be someone I admire
And it’s funny how I imagined
That I would be that person now
But it does not seem to have happened
Maybe I’ve just forgotten how to see
That I am not exactly the person that I thought I’d be

And in my mind
In the faraway here and now
I’ve become in control somehow
And I never lose my wallet
Because I will be the picture of of discipline
Never fucking up anything
And I’ll be a good defensive driver
And it’s funny how I imagined
That I would be that person now
But it does not seem to have happened
Maybe I’ve just forgotten how to see
That I’ll never be the person that I thought I’d be

And in my mind
When I’m old I am beautiful
Planting tulips and vegetables
Which I will mindfully watch over
Not like me now
I’m so busy with everything
That I don’t look at anything
But I’m sure I’ll look when I am older
And it’s funny how I imagined
That I could be that person now
But that’s not what I want
But that’s what I wanted
And I’d be giving up somehow
How strange to see
That I don’t wanna be the person that I want to be

And in my mind
I imagine so many things
Things that aren’t really happening
And when they put me in the ground
I’ll start pounding the lid
Saying I haven’t finished yet
I still have a tattoo to get
That says I’m living in the moment
And it’s funny how I imagined
That I could win this, win this fight
But maybe it isn’t all that funny
That I’ve been fighting all my life
But maybe I have to think it’s funny
If I wanna live before I die
And maybe it’s funniest of all
To think I’ll die before I actually see
That I am exactly the person that I want to be

Fuck yes
I am exactly the person that I want to be

Tunesday-Clarity by Zedd featuring Foxes

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I dive into frozen waves
Where the past comes back to life
Fight fear for the selfish pain
It was worth it every time

Hold still right before we crash
Cause we both know how this ends
Our clock ticks till it breaks your glass
And I drown in you again

Cause you are the piece of me
I wish I didn’t need
Chasing relentlessly
Still fight and I don’t know why

If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?

If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?

Walk on through a red parade
And refuse to make amends
It cuts deep through our ground
And makes us forget all common sense

Don’t speak as I try to leave
Cause we both know what we’ll choose
If you pull, then I’ll push too deep
And I’ll fall right back to you

Cause you are the piece of me
I wish I didn’t need
Chasing relentlessly
Still fight and I don’t know why

If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?

Why are you my clarity?
Why are you my remedy?
Why are you my remedy?
Why are you my remedy?

If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
If our love’s insanity, why are you my clarity?

Tunesday-An American Girl by Bonnie McKee

Bonnie+McKee+Smoking

After yesterday’s post it’s time to lighten the mood for Tunesday. Here’s a cute little ditty from Bonnie McKee. Crank it up baby and dance your pants off!

I fell in love in a 7/11 parking lot
Sat on the curb drinking slurpees we mixed with alcohol
We talked about all our dreams and how we would show ’em all (whoa oh oh oh)
I told him I got a plan and I’m gonna dominate
And I don’t need any man to be getting in my way
But if you talk with your hands then we can negotiate (whoa oh oh oh)
I just keep moving my body (yeah)
I’m always ready to party (yeah)
No I don’t listen to mommy (yeah)
And I’ll never say that I’m sorry

Chorus
Oh I’m an American girl
Hot blooded and I’m ready to go I’m loving taking over the world
Hot blooded, all american girl (Whoa) I was raised by a television
Every day is a competition Put the key in my ignition (Oh-way-oh)

I wanna see all the stars and everything in between I wanna buy a new heart out of a vending machine
Cause It’s a free country so baby we can do anything (Whoa)
I just keep moving my body (yeah) I’m always ready to party (yeah) No I don’t listen to mommy (yeah) and I’ll never say that I’m sorry

Chorus
Oh I’m an American girl Hot blooded and I’m ready to go I’m loving taking over the world Hot blooded, all American girl (Whoa) I was raised by a television Every day is a competition Put the key in my ignition (Oh-way-oh)

You know we’re gonna shine so bright (Oh we’re gonna shine so bright…) Oh baby gonna go all night (Oh we’re gonna go all night) You know we’re gonna shine so bright (Oh we’re gonna shine so bright…) Oh baby gonna go all night

Chorus
Oh I’m an american girl
Hot blooded and I’m ready to go I’m loving taking over the world Hot blooded, all american girl (Whoa) I was raised by a television Every day is a competition Put the key into my ignition (Oh-way-oh)

Oh I’m an american girl
Hot blooded and I’m ready to go I’m loving taking over the world
I’m an American girl…

Tunesday-Strong Enough

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God I feel like hell tonight
The tears of rage I cannot fight
I’d be the last to help you understand

Are you strong enough to be my man
My man

Nothing’s true, and nothing’s right
So let me be alone tonight
‘Cause you can’t change the way I am

Are you strong enough to be my man

Lie to me, I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me, but please don’t leave

I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
Just try and love me if you can

Are you strong enough to be my man
Are you strong enough to be my man
Are you strong enough
My man

When I’ve shown you
That I just don’t care
When I’m throwing punches in the air
When I’m broken down and I can’t stand

Would you be man enough to be my man

Lie to me, I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me, but please don’t leave

I Still Call it Pine Knob

pine knob

This slogan is emblazoned on a t-shirt that you can find on the Down With Detroit website. The outdoor concert venue is now called DTE Energy Music Theater, but anyone that has attended a concert there since it opened in 1972 has called it the Knob. There is theater seating. I’ve never sat there though. I’ve always chosen the lawn. There’s nothing like standing at the gates waiting for them to open, ticket and blanket in hand.

The first time I attended a concert there, it was with my daddy. He got free tickets from one of his state trooper buddies, I’m sure. We saw Eddie Rabbit and Juice Newton. Don’t you dare judge me, I was a kid and had no idea what good music was yet. The night was warm and the crowd, huge. We left before the encore though, as Daddy always had to beat the traffic.

I saw Bob Seger there in 1985. I danced on the hill with my boyfriend at the time and my BFFs from high school. When Bob sang the song Main Street, I screamed, ‘hey, I know where that’s at.’ I was such a dork.

In 1988 I saw Guns and Roses, and Aerosmith. Holy shit that was a great night! All I remember was lots of beer and great music. Gina and I danced like maniacs and ran around chasing boys. Aerosmith put on a spectacular show, and Steven Tyler while nothing to look at, had an incredible voice. Yes, Axl Rose was crazy, but his voice was meant to be that of an 80’s rock god.

I took my kids to see the Barenaked Ladies in 1998. They were seven and eight years old. I warned them that there may be people drinking and smoking pot. That there would probably be a few people making out and otherwise acting stupid. I explained that I wasn’t going to shield them from real life.

I stood on the hill with the kids and my nephew, the lights went up and the band took the stage. Of course, people starting sparking joints all around us. Meggie yelled, ‘Mommy, someone is smoking pot!’ All I could do was laugh and move her closer to me. We danced and sang every tune. I was spending time with my kids at Pine Knob. Fuck the fact that the proverbial they were now calling it the DTE Energy Music Theater.

On July 6th, 2013 Roger Darling, Meggie, Kylie and I sat on the hill. We were surrounded by at least 25,000 other souls. We took in the sights and sounds of the Goo Goo Dolls and Matchbox 20. The tickets were 25.00. A steal in this economy.

As the sun set, the air became redolent with the sweet smell of weed. I don’t smoke it anymore, but I did take a quick intake of breath as the scent wafted in the wind around me. Roger laughed when I turned around and waved my hands at the kids behind us and signaled to them to blow their second hand smoke my way. They looked up at me sheepishly, but I just smiled and told them to have fun.

Matchbox 20 started playing the song 3 A.M. I swayed to the beat and sang the words at the top of my lungs. I looked to my right and one of the cute young men behind me passed me his joint. I was so damn tempted to take the hit, but I declined. I smiled my best smile, whirled around and continued to sway to the passionate voice of Rob Thomas.

After the encore, we made the slow jaunt over the hill and back to the car. The reverb jostling our eardrums and the fresh memories of our night falling from our lips. Yes, it will always be Pine Knob. The name alone holds a certain nostalgia for so many of us Michiganders.

Someone To Watch Over Me

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There’s a somebody I’m longin’ to see
I hope that he, turns out to be
Someone who’ll watch over me

~George Gershwin~

“Will you wait for me?”

“Of course Darling, we’ve got nothing but time.”

The view from the window is always the same, as she waits for the man she loves to come home. There’s the longing  to share a meal of grilled cheese sandwiches, tomato soup and sweet wine with him. To fall, without a care into bed, and make love till the first gray light of the next morning.

Thank you Lillie McFerrin for hosting Five Sentence Fiction. Go to her page to read more entries. And thank you to Illustrious Peacock for the gorgeous photograph.

Five Sentence Fiction